Muskrat Ramblings
Insert Bear Pun Here
Posted by John

Just a quick update on Frakie the Bear’s saga, as reported here this last Tuesday.

Guess who stopped by when I got home that day?

The “HOLY FRAK” moment occurs about 1:20 in.

I’ve named him “Frackie the Bear,” by the way, as that’s quicker and easier than saying “HOLY FRAK! THERE’S A FRAKKING BEAR IN OUR FRAKKING YARD!” every time.

I’m also thinking of rewriting the lyrics to this, to reflect the Frackie the Bear saga.

Muskrat Central: Bear-free for 27 hours, now.

****

I’m quoting my pal Matt Forbeck verbatim, here, as I’m biased, having written the intro to “The Bones,” the new book by GamePLAYwright.

“Gameplaywright.net have just opened up pre-orders for the special edition of The Bones, a book of essays about everyone’s favorite random number generators: dice. It features pieces by some of the brightest lights in the gaming industry, including Keith Baker, Jason L Blair, Greg Costikyan, Ray Fawkes, Pat Harrigan, Jess Hartley, Fred Hicks, Will Hindmarch, Kenneth Hite, John Kovalic, James Lowder, Russ Pitts, Jesse Scoble, Mike Selinker, Jared Sorensen, Paul Tevis, Jeff Tidball, Monica Valentinelli, Chuck Wendig, and Wil Wheaton. Plus a little bit by me titled “Daryl Hannah’s Dice Saved My Marriage.”

“The special version is a hardcover edition limited to just 100 copies, each of which comes with the PDF of the book as well. Will Hindmarch, who put the whole book together, will sign and number each of these personally.

“I already have my PDF of the book, and it’s fantastic. If you’ve ever owned a dice bag, if you’ve ever spun a d6 on its point, if you’ve ever wondered about the most basic tools we use to determine our fate, this book is for you.”

- John

Muskrat Ramblings
Here there be BAAARS
posted by John

How is my morning going, you ask?

Here. Let’s play “Follow John’s Tweets.” (https://twitter.com/muskrat_john)

A bear was spotted in Waunakee a week ago. I think it visited us last night. A BEAR. http://yfrog.com/28v9uj
about 2 hours ago via Twitterrific

Did I mention…A FRAKING BEAR? http://yfrog.com/0r8s5dj http://yfrog.com/cbnqfqj http://yfrog.com/0uy2snj
about 2 hours ago via Twitterrific

That birdfeeder pole is over an inch thick…AND NOW BENT AT THE GROUND. http://yfrog.com/0h18505699j http://yfrog.com/743aodj
about 2 hours ago via Twitterrific

Yeah…sorry I’ll be late to the studio this morning. Gotta deal with a BEAR THAT WAS IN MY BACK YARD…
about 2 hours ago via Twitterrific

It was a black bear, which I’m told “isn’t so bad.” I’m sorry, did someone forget that “black bear” STILL HAS THE FRAKING WORD “BEAR” IN IT?
about 2 hours ago via Twitterrific

An ant problem “isn’t so bad.” A chipmunk problem “isn’t so bad.” A gopher problem “isn’t so bad.” A BEAR PROBLEM IS *BAD*!
about 2 hours ago via Twitterrific

What does it say about you people that more than one of you have responded, giving me a bear’s HIT POINTS…? #notreassuring
about 1 hour ago via Twitterrific

What good is having a cat in the house if it won’t get rid of the bears? I ask you…
about 1 hour ago via Twitterrific

Department of Natural Resources’ advice on dealing with bears, summarized: “Don’t be so tasty.”
about 1 hour ago via Twitterrific

I find the DNR’s advice on bears suspect, as at no point does it cover Pick-a-nick Baskets…
about 1 hour ago via Twitterrific

RT @fizzlefozzle – Why not get a bigger bear?
about 1 hour ago via Twitterrific

As @tenzochris noted, animal escalation rarely turns out well. Ask the old woman who swallowed a horse.
about 1 hour ago via Twitterrific

To spite the bear, I am putting EXTRA HONEY in my breakfast smoothie this morning. Yeah, you heard me right, bear! FRAK YOU, BEAR!
about 1 hour ago via Twitterrific

Animals are more scared of us than we are of them. Up to the point they realize we’re meaty and delicious…
40 minutes ago via Twitterrific

Safely at the downtown studio. No bears sighted on premises. Yet.
1 minute ago via web

Worst part of the bear incident? Now have the theme from “The Hair Bear Bunch” stuck in my head…
half a minute ago via web

- John