I wrote some of the below to a friend.

I’m posting it here, and expanding just a bit, because I’m not sure I want to try and say this a different way.

…sorry I’ve been quiet for a while.

My 18-year old cat, Spider, who has slowed down quite a bit over the years, became quite ill for the last 14 days or so. And was getting worse.

Last night was the first really bad one for him, though. He couldn’t walk or stand anymore, and seemed to be not feeling just uncomfortable, but in actual pain.

This morning, we had the vet come round.

Rather than seeing Spidey in any further pain, we decided it was best for him to go to be with Cleopatra, my other 18-year-old, who passes away in May.

I haven’t felt much like doing much of anything these last two weeks, save getting work done that was absolutely necessary.

I’m the kind of person who finds this kind of thing gutting. There are times I wish I could be tougher in these situations, but at this point in my life, I’m content being comfortable with who I am.

I know there are people in the world who are far worse off than I am, and who have real troubles, who have lost more, and who are in greater pain. I suppose, sometimes, though, that succumbing to your own small pain is OK, even if others are far worse off. It’s not a competition. Sometimes things just suck, no matter what point in life you happen to be in.

In a few days, things will be better, and I’ll be able to help people who really have it bad. It’s just that right now, i don’t feel like I’d be much help to anybody.

This will pass.

Anyway, sorry again for my recent silence. I deal with things like this in a very personal and private way.

Spider was very, VERY dear to me, and he and Cleo were with me nearly half my life. He was one of those wonderful cats that just love life, aren’t stand-offish, and are a joy to have in your life.

I miss him terribly. I miss her terribly.

I can’t believe they’re both gone.

Miss you, buddy pal cat.

John

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PS. Oh, yes. To the two folks who sent very snotty e-mails on the fact the no new cartoons have been posted for a while…thanks much. That was really appreciated, and made this whole thing much easier to get through…

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